Sunday, November 22, 2009

I understood something today

WELL....lets just say...I understand myself a little better....why all the frustration, hurt, and anger???  A great friend of mine,,,I refer to her as my councelor.  Her councelor told her that when life throws you into this kind of trauma...a trauma of the heart and mind....all sorts of things happen.  A failed marriage is VERY TRAUMATIC.  It leaves one wounded, a bleeding heart, among other wounds.

Just imagine....failed marriage, hurts beyond imagination.  A new set of problems, worries, and fears....essentially this person is laying on a guerney bleeding, however only time heals these wounds.  Someone comes along with judgemental words, an opinion, or a good intention....anyways the words are very discouraging to this very injured person....that discouragment is like putting salt on the wounds....it prolongs healing.  Then some other person comes along adds more salt with

11-22-09 SUNDAY

this is a first....I woke wanting to compose an entry....I woke up this am...came downstairs...so realizing that everyroom in this house is in disarray. JUST HOW DID WE GET HERE...

It is Sunday....A TIME TO WORSHIP......A TIME TO REST.    What does this look like to the single mother of 4....she doesnt know where to begin.   She knows what needs to be done, but where to begin.  First she has to find the energy to address this family's needs.  Where does she find that....IN THE LORD


DEAR WONDERFUL MERCIFUL SAVIOUR..

THIS IS THE DAY THAT YOU HAVE MADE...HELP US REJOICE AND BE GLAD IN IT....

1.  How should we rejoice
2.  How to be glad in it.

REMOVE MY GUILT AND REPLACE IT WITH SOMETHING WE CAN WORK WITH.  GIVE ME CREATIVITY TO BRING SOME HEALING AND DEPENDENCY ON YOU INTO THIS DAY.  CONSUME ME AND MY CHILDREN WITH ALL OF YOU..   KEEP OUR EYES ON YOU AND NOT OF THE STUFF OF THIS WORLD.  PLACE A HEDGE AROUND US, ONE THAT EVEN THE ENEMY CAN NOT PENETRATE.

GIVE ME THY HEALING POWERS
1. against anger
2. laziness which distracts me from you

PRICK MY HEART DAILY OF HOW MUCH I NEED YOU AND THY WORD.  USE ME TO BRING GLORY TO YOUR KINGDOM.  USE ME TO BE A LIGHT AND SALT.  USE ME IN A QUIET UNSEEN WAY.  ESPECIALLY IN MY HOME.  ONLY YOU CAN DO THIS...ONLY YOU HAVE THIS KIND OF WISDOM AND CREATIVITY.  ONLY YOU HAVE THE POWER OF THIS MAGNITUDE AND ABILITIES.

I PRAY OVER MY CHILDREN...
  1. patience
  2. kindness
  3. the conscious of right and wrong that comes only from the Holy Spirit
  4. protection from the enemy...protection from the world, peers
  5. health and knowledge
  6. a desire to learn about YOU...that only you can place in their hearts and minds
  7. discernment
  8. responsibility
  9. a deep desire to please YOU
  10. obedience
  11. discipline
LORD THANK YOU FOR HEARING MY PRAYER...HELP ME TO CLEAN OUT MY HEART DUMP THE BAD OUT...I WANT TO DO THIS WILLINGLY WITH YOUR HELP...PLEASE NO TRIAL IN DOING SO.


LOVE  AND IN JESUS NAME

ME..A SERVANT IN THE MAKING

Saturday, November 21, 2009

The journey

Where Should I start...maybe  praising God...reflecting on the enemys power.....defining the pain, the loneliness.  I am not sure,,,but I do know that I have to be encouraged.  God is bigger than my storm....I will praise Him in this storm.  I will glorify Him in His presence.  Thank Him for scriptures such as Psalm 34 and many many others.

If this was my thorn for life, I could bare it...but the enemy keeps me wondering...is something bigger coming down the road in life...  Are my children going to make it.  Will they love the Lord, Our God with a hunger and thirst that only HE above can quench.

Then I think of the anger...The anger that comes with emotional trauma.  The hurt emotions that often causes me (and many others )  to speak words we regret... 

The Fear...but to realize that God does not give us the Spirit of Fear; but of power, and of LOVE, and of a sound mind.  11 Timothy 1:7

The Judgement....only to realize that we are not equipped to use that "spirit"...never...We humanly can not exercise judgement.  We don"t have the wisdom.

The world....Where me and my children are now part of....we now are a statistic that is so common in the "world"....Who will have more influence over them.....mommy or the world...She is stretched beyond to point that only a single mother can ever understand.

The need for PRAYER....the power that comes with it....where 2 or more gather in my name...I like to think that means 2 people praying is 2X powerful...Hence the reason for this entry...Help me to overcome .... help me to overcome the anger of hurt....help me to overcome the judgement from man....help me and my children overcome the world...Prayer with me for an overcoming life...


Please partner with me in this storm...it takes a church sometimes to raise a single parent home....thanks you and Many Blessings to all...


sheila k

Friday, November 13, 2009

sheila and the fabulous four

ok...my day off and I am ready to take a nap

Thursday, November 5, 2009

call before you crash the party

Ok....morgan stayed over night at jane hartzlers, one part of the terrific 2 missing from dinner....expected a nice calm dinner>>>>Skyler.....ended up in bed...I just know he will tinkle in the bed tonight...dinner finished...part of the 2 month plan...just ok

talked the kids into cleaning up the kitchen, while I sat down for a couple of minutes.  Wouldnt you know that Jim and Pat stop over.  Usually at this time of night I am up and moving, but they walk in and see me laying around and the house a mess.   Oh well...It is no secret that I do not have it all together.

Anyways, prior to my visit, I was kind of down.  The kids have to be effected by this whole protection order.  I called Gabriels teacher, sort out her feelings...  Now what to do about jacob....time for a prayer request
Mrs. Donna Ryan.  She and Gabriel are very good friends.  Last year they journaled together which helped Gabriel
Dear God

Its me sheila...
I need so much wisdom, direction, ambition and patience.
Give me Grace for the moment
Grace to finish my day
Grace to organize my morning
Grace to get into YOUR word
Grace for directing my children
Grace for patience

Lord I need what I dont even know what I need.   I need to communicate with my children...wisdom, for raising them in this  less than perfect situation. 

Lord, help me to build them up
Lord, give my children a hearts desire for you
Lord, give me a bigger hearts desire for you

I pray for cooperation from them with bible study,  family tradition, family fun that gives you the glory

Lord I want you as the Head of this Household...Help us to establish YOUR PRESENCE and know that YOU ARE OUR ALL AND ALL

LOVE LOVE LVOE YOU

Saturday, October 10, 2009

painted pottery with gabriel

Today started out as a nasty day, turned lovely....woke up this am to all my children...and it was good.  Skyler, once again, was trying to upset the apple cart..  I think I threatened his life 5 times before the sun came up...LOL.  Then motherhood struck me, looked at the clock, and knew the day had to stand for something....

up, up, up....chores...go jacob.....go jacob......go jacob......GO JACOB.....I  am not going to scream....why should I.   I told the kids, even wrote it down for them and made them each there own book,  listen the first time....labeled under first response reaction!!!  and that means something around here.

Chores done, accomplished something off the mothering need to do list.  On to next agenda....make the house look good because a good looking house means a good women....isnt it said....behind every clean house is a successful woman......hee hee...oh ....behind every successful man....blah blah blah....my man, father of the kids left again...hmmm

well off to a football game in the big red furry shirt...jacob...
  
okay I am back....so back to morning....gabby and I left to paint pottery with michele and her daughter....so much fun.  Gabriel painted flip flops and I painted a pencil holder..  now I am tired and am going to do some no brain activities

My thought titles

  1. what the Bible taught me today
  2. Be still and know that I am God moments
  3. verse is am concentrating on
  4. todays focus with children
  5. prayers
  6. blessings
  7. happenings of the day
  8. moments with memory
  9. crazy sheila moments
  10. reflecting on my children
  11. blessed by the touch of the Masters Hand
  12. self evaluation
  13. silly stuff
  14. can i not think for a moment
  15. lists that were created......lists that happened
  16. whats for dinner
  17. life just sucks sometimes
  18. break down
  19. just for fun
  20. just because I can
  21. Oh let me be irresponsible for a moment
  22. i want to be taken care of
  23. i need a back rub
  24. the book of the day....funny stuff....i am a self help junkie
  25. what my kids taught me today
  26. what I taught my kids today
  27. a good kid day
  28. i am in control of my emotions day
  29. i didnt have to loose voice control today
  30. for the love of texting
  31. for the love of just about anything
  32. oh poor wittle me moments
  33. happy days ahead
  34. i wish i was........
  35. lets get busy
  36. for pity sakes moments
  37. my diet is going strong
  38. will power versus self control
  39. just how interesting does my life get
  40. yes I should have a reality show
  41. humor...give me some
  42. yes i'm not the only one that doesnt have it together.....yeah
  43. yeah...life moments
  44. just because.....i can????
  45. pray for me please
  46. rate my childrens behavior........rate my own behavior
  47. let it go and give it over to the one who creative me
  48. why God did you allow this behavior
  49. God....you created me and all my flaws....I am letting you take over and I am serious....take over, but dont let it be uncomfortable
  50. little blessing that are wonderful
  51. little blessings that add color
  52. yes this life isnt supposed to be the big event, the best of the best, the big yum yum...it is not major leagues
  53. Lord I am having a "heaven can not wait moment"   but make sure my kids are with me
  54. the song that rocked my day
  55. i had the i should be wearing a skirt day
  56. where is my......(what)
  57. what more could i loose
  58. alzhiemers....
  59. i am soooo proud of my kids
  60. i accomplished something   or   nothing

what I love

  1. Jesus
  2. thoughts of heaven
  3. learning about God and His word
  4. My children
  5. My mom and dad
  6. My friend darlene
  7. My friends
  8. My family
  9. reeces pumkins...yum yum
  10. sleeping in
  11. a clean house
  12. organization
  13. completed paperwork
  14. challenges
  15. bella
  16. snuggling with morgan
  17. holding morgan in my arms
  18. sitting at at my kitchen table surrounded by my children
  19. my children playing with each other
  20. good books
  21. barnes and nobles
  22. panera bread
  23. good steak
  24. reading
  25. my computer
  26. journalling
  27. philippians 4,   plus others
  28. sitting outside on my swing at night when all the world around is inside
  29. a fire in the fireplace
  30. being creative
  31. having a day off
  32. being encouraged
  33. texting
  34. technology

what I love

Sunday, October 4, 2009

sunday oct 4

I am still trying to figure out this blogging..my goal is to create an online journal...

Friday, October 2, 2009

a great day

woke up this am...very early... before my  children...what makes a good day???  a God who knows me and knows my heart....A God that brings me through the fire....A God that takes care of me....

then I ask why would He be good to me...

proverbs  3:5  Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding...acknowledge Him in all your ways and He shall direct your path

To rest on this, one of many, passages

Friday, September 25, 2009

okay I have no idea how I just got back to this blog....so I am testing it out..this was made at
 

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